The Big Boys Club

“”Sorry, Kid,” says Mr. V-for-Vain-Deadeye, “but if you want to be in our club, you must demonstrate ruthlessness.”

“Killing the military hero in Iran wasn’t enough?”

“Bush league,” says Macho Badass Soddy. “Pun intended.”

“But then I air-struck their nuke place!”

“Ineffective,” says Scheme Jock Ugly. “They still have the stuff. You were suckered.”

Soddy says, “Now, you’re on the right track with the Not-Nice Squad. Have one of THEM kill someone, someone who is not brown or black, and then EVERYONE will fear you. Especially if you let the killer get away with it.”

“If I do, am I in?”

“Put it this way: If you don’t, you don’t have a snowball’s chance in Hell.”

..

Unbeknownst to the boys in the clubhouse, Mr. Sheez-Are-They-In-For-A-Surprise was listening remotely. He chuckled with delight. Boys will be boys, after all, but they are no match for a shrewd and patient man. At the right moment he will end all their domination games with one merciless gesture.