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  1. My friend and former classmate Vicki makes COVID-19 masks, and she sent me one a couple of weeks ago. It fits great, and it survived machine washing. I am doubly lucky, because the Day 20 prompt for National Poetry Writing Month is “write a poem about a handmade gift.”

20200419_220852

To V. S. G.

now i take me out to shop

the mask that Vicki made WILL STOP

the dreaded Cee Oh Vee Eye Dee

19–just stay six feet from me!

THANKS, Vicki!!!

Today’s National Poetry Writing Month 2020 prompt was to write a poem related to objects found during a walk.

the meanderthal

a real-time archeologist
plays ambulatory tic-tac-toe
through the weakly-violated Cartesian grid of greater Phoenix Arizona
and collects
a Lug-Nut, a single Bristle from a Street-Sweeper,
a Tiparillo-Holder with Octagonal Cross-Section,
a Plastic Bottle-Cap with Grip-Ribbing, and–
O MY GOD!–a 1933 MERCURY DIME.

2020 9419 the meanderthal

elation is displaced by S O R R O W
when the archeologist intuits
that the dime was left
deliberately by a
woman facing Death
who had no further use for it.

Today our prompt is to write a poem celebrating the little nice things that get us through a day, a year, a life.

2020 0418 lite nice ness

Lite Nice Ness

Let’s look at the things that give a day a bit o’ gain
It’s as small as landing safely when you’re on a plane
T‘would be mush less saucy had we not War Chest or Shires
E‘er the wee! sweet! lovelinesses spiking our desires

One of the little nicenesses that get me through a day is Bad Puns. I love making them up, and I love when other people make them up and I read them. The third line of this poem is straight out of Badpunsville. “mush less saucy” is doubly punnish. Mush could also be Much, but Mush is edible. Saucy could be either attitude or condimental. And then “War Chest or Shires” is a wretchedification of Worcestershire, which is a sauce pronounced variously as “wurrshurr” or “woostisure” or “watery brown stuff.” I won’t apologize that “War Chest or Shires” matches no known pronunciation. It is closer to the actual spelling as anything I’ve heard.

Lastly, the whole poem is a setup for a Bad Pun. Notice that the first word of every line is a contraction. “Why, Gary??” I hear you asking. SO glad you asked, Friend! (Or “Friends,” if there is still more than one of you still reading.) (Or “Is there an echo in here?” if in fact no one is left reading.) The reason every first word is festooned with an apostrophe is answerable in two words. Here they come. Don’t hate me.

“Contractual obligations.” [Bdumph/Shhhuhh] (Rimshot.)

Ah, Apostrophes!! Don’t you just love the Little Things that Get You Through Life?

2020 0418 over atop

This morning I was watching a video featuring the late John Prine. He was at a festival that had “Not Strictly Bluegrass” in its title. Inference says it was 2017 because Prine dedicated the song “Your Flag Decal Won’t Get You Into Heaven Anymore” to “The New Führer, Adolf Benito Trumpetini.” And bless Honest John Prine’s protest-prone heart. He certainly had Trump pegged.

Prine has gotten a lot of deserved and long-overdue attention since he contracted, and eventually succumbed to, COVID-19. His many fans may enjoy a listen to another Heaven-related song, “When I Get To Heaven,” which begins with these spoken words:

“When I get to Heaven, I’m gonna shake God’s hand.
I’ll thank Him for more blessings than one man can stand.
Then I’ll find me a guitar, and start a Rock ‘n’ Roll Band.
And check into a swell hotel. Ain’t the Afterlife grand?”

John, this one’s for you. Wish you were here.

Over Atop

OMGDG someone call the DEA
Onward! For amazement jazzes up both alp & lea

Verily some Jameson laced your café au laît
Very Fine to Mint–remember LSMFT

Endchronic maelstromic War serves the libretto
Ectoplasmic echoes gather souls from manse to ghetto

Romper Room is OVER friends–balloon’s about to pop
Rise the fell APOCALYPSE the fullness of the stop