umbilicus
unplug and your lifeline no longer feeds
make do in bewilderment fog and weeds
befuddled by offline you crave a clue
instead mere reality stirs the stew
lurch hither and yon for a missing link
it’s nonhypertextual so you think
card catalogs microfiche books and such
unraveled before and may–not so much
so sorry to tell you you’re out of touch
days
awaken mutter
swing legs over bed edge
gain footing dazedly walk
uneven urinary flow
clumsiness with pills
flossing finds a tender gumslot
the shower curtains are defiant
shampoo lather migrates to eye
despite caution a foot slips
another day takes the stage
there will be breathing and walking
reading and ridicule
warm inner glow of a good meal
flesh degradation under a relentless sun
a return home and an exhausted flop
we build cathedrals of days
altars and gargoyles apses and pews
sanctuaries against oblivion
sobriety adds sturdiness
friendship is the mortar
and every hour is another brick
rigged fake fraud hoax
hey weirddude
you have used all these words
thousands of times
implying that rigging
and faking and fraudulence
and hoaxing
are really bad things
and yet you rig have rigged and will rig
i mean c’mon
you just successfully rigged
the decriminalization
of some really nasty things you did
bringing suit
in something called (you CANNOT
make this shit up)
“Donald Trump v. The United States
of America”
dude
you have faked with fake electors
you defrauded the real estate purveyors
of new york
your 2020 “stop the steal” was
a big
fat
hoax
if only telling lies caused laryngitis
(but then you would hoarsely lie
that you had REAL laryngitis)
if only you would go away quietly
but your vladdy daddy doesn’t want you to
because you’ve been unbelievably useful
and idiotic
to his purpose
and your aid and comfort
is one of his hostile foreign superpowers
tariffs are not toys dude
kim jongalong un is not a sweetheart
and you are not the biggest baddest despot
that ever was
you are merely a tool
and when they are done with you
or better yet
when the People of the United States
of America
defeat you once and for all
you’ll be shopping for a prison
that has golf
[First published on my Facebook feed earlier today]
isogi
the gun carnage now includes
sympathy for the devil
the devil’s base is fortified
their bloodied hero
using the same word he used
to get them mobbed up
and storming the citadel of the Republic:
‘fight’
the good guys are stunned
and wondering what body blow is next
and how our country
can possibly avoid
a repressive dictatorship
since ‘fight’ has already been appropriated
here is another effort-word:
‘isogi’
it is medieval Japanese for ‘pull’
and saw service in the novel SHOGUN
by james clavell
when pilot Blackthorne had his ship
in the jaws of a typhoon
and the only chance for the crew’s survival
was for the oarsmen to pull on the oars
with all of their might;
with more than their might; with
superhuman effort
“ISOGI!!!” screamed the Anjin-San
and put into his demanding voice
an elixir of strength
and in so doing
was himself transformed
from a foreign devil
into a formidable ally
and the ship and crew were saved
because the oarsmen
did the impossible
so you
you who are worried sick
that the country as we know it
is going down in flames
you have a job to do
you have the impossible to do
but your weapons are sense
and REAL patriotism
and the sure knowledge
that your cause is just
so let us grip our oars
let us defy the typhoon
and pull beyond all
I S O G I
state of the union 2024
this just in: two-thirds
of the supreme court
of the united states of america
kisses ex-presidential ass
and is eager to help him
become president again
by uncriming his many executive crimes
in other breaking news
fighter jets are not scrambling
nor speeding to mar-a-lago
in order to reduce it to flaming ruin
nor are there immediate plans
to remove a megalomaniac
from the face of the nation
and rendition him to a dank elsewhere
to be tried for treason against humanity
the trouble with decency
is that indecent opponents
can cheat and steal and wreak havoc
using tactics no decent human being
would ever consider
and decency is on the wane to boot
and so the would-be future emperor
is being fitted
for his new clothes
and he knows that he will be naked
but he wants it that way
the better for the world
to kiss
his naked emperor’s ass
Prompt: Write a platonic-love poem, not necessarily about platonic love with another person.
Warning: Liberal use, even for a liberal, of the F-word and variants. Vulgarity abounds. You can’t say Vulgarity without Gair, I’m afraid.
Grateful acknowledgment to Dorothy Parker, for a reason detailed in the Afterword.
I Fucking Love Clay
The Clay is so reliable,
Manipulable/pliable,
And so I wish to sing a versed hosanna.
Because…
It’s transfinitely variable,
Nigh Curly Joe/Moe/Larryable,
The mother of all forms: a sweet Madonna.
But…
It’s muscled as a trucker,
A Bad-Ass Motherfucker,
And does my heavy lifting with no sweat.
And…
It’s Totem-Pole-Esque stackable,
Fine-Grained or Off-the-Rackable,
And Glazable As Fuck as you can get.
So…
I LOVE it unreservedly,
Wins Loyalty deservedly,
And throwing on The Wheel sure keeps me centered.
Plus…
It’s won me recognitions,
And one or two commissions,
In juried art shows that I’ve erstly entered.
Still…
My Clay-Love is Platonic,
Though I wax unlaconic,
IFLC, as I hope you now see.
So…
I’ve no Portnoy’s Complaint,
And exercise restraint:
IFLC, not LFC–not me!!
Afterword: This is a Punchline poem, and I owe Dorothy Parker the punchline. Legend has it that she was on her honeymoon when an impatient producer messaged her that he wanted her promised script, pronto. Her prompt six-word reply was “Too Fucking Busy, and Vice Versa.” Thus, I Fucking Love Clay, but I don’t Love Fucking Clay. I really DID want to Push the Platonic Envelope, though. And though I’m sure I’ve offended a few of my friends with this, I own my ribald, vulgar side, inherited by my grandfather via my mother. (My father could be vulgar but in the presence of his Aunt Zilpha he was quite the tight-ass.)
As for Portnoy’s Complaint, which I read and howled over as a teenager, Portnoy confessed to his psychiatrist that the worst thing he had ever done was to use the liver destined for his family’s dinner to satisfy his adolescent lust, violating it behind a billboard. I would never do that with any clay, even porcelain.
(First published in the Facebook poetry group Poets All Call)
Coda
Loves are lost
And irretrievable
Notions tossed
And blurred but grievable
Etched, embossed,
And I believe a full
Life is a song that winds down with a coda
Neath chupah or ceiling or scrolls of pagoda.
Woe-infused
Yet laughter-adjacent
Doom-bemused
Though joy’s ever-nascent
Thrice-accused
Of tales somnifacient
The weary composer welds landmarks with themes
With a filter of dreamstuff and not-as-it-seems.
If a song
Has many verses
Overlong
And laced up with curses
Quell the throng
Until it disperses…
You’ll find common threads in the lilting and lulling
And capstone that ending with smooth-water sculling…
Birth comes with cymbals
And nimble progression
Toddling percussion
Concussive succession
Wrought adolescence
Will test your endurance
Fledgling adulthood’s
Long stood in demurrance
Then the adventures!
The dentures can wait
Yearning and romance
And slow dance and Fate.
Now violins
For the sins and the story
Now muted woodwinds
Rescinding vainglory.
Soft notes that dwindle
Unkindle the flame
Your life’s coda ends
Yet ascends
All the same.
This is my take on the complex man on whom Kurt Vonnegut (loosely) based his character Kilgore Trout. Many of Sturgeon's story and novel titles may be found in the acrostic.
navy seal team 6
was mentioned this week
as an example
of how absurd
the term “presidential immunity” is.
no, even a sitting president,
commander of the armed forces,
cannot order seal team 6
to assassinate the president’s political foes
and invoke presidential immunity
to escape prosecution.
do the seals celebrate
the press they got
implying their ruthless effectiveness?
they are unavailable for comment
or other silliness.
fresh year!
(Grateful thanks to my friend George/Fred for enlightening me about the AI dilemma with Agency.)
2024 is firmly here / no more can go wrong in 23 / and plenty went right like indictments and fusion / gas prices went down and are on their way out
let’s wish for clean decency / and decent honesty and honest cleanliness / let’s enjoy quiet victories / and endure noisy defeats / resolving to make them reversible
but we are still killing / everything from cockroaches to ethnicities / and everyone says Peace On Earth / but at the same time so many say They Killed My Family So Now They Must Die
some savvy coder must be out there / building a STOP KILLING algorithm / for an entity on a shoestring budget / but virtually unlimited pattern-ingenuity
she or he or they are aware / that there are pitfalls / for instance the easiest way to stop killing / is to invent a biocide that kills everyone and everything / after which the killing stops forever / and that can be done on a shoestring
so the mandate changes to PRESERVE LIFE / which is better but still plenty tricky / because Life really does begin at conception / so maybe we qualify Life / with qualifiers like “desirable” or “deserving” / but o my / that’s a whole new and large can of worms
but the optimistic part of me / on this first day of the fresh year / sees lots of evidence / that AI is already at play / and solving the problem / using the GIVE EVERYONE EVERYTHING THEY WANT mandate
so far there are cars that drive more safely than human beings / and kiosks easy to use that are like Aladdin’s genies and take your orders/wishes tirelessly / and songs you wish Melissa Etheridge and Irving Berlin collaborated on / and finders of “whatever I want near Me” that give you good answers in a nano or two / and then tell you how to get there either walking or driving or public-transing / and then there’s the ass-kissing
for AI also stands for “Asskiss Illimitable” and that is why when you want to know / what kind of animal you are / AI looks at your behavior pattern / and describes your traits with the glowingest terms:
“Gary, you are a WOLF. You are fiercely, honestly, uncompromisingly ambitious. The leader of the pack, you help your loved ones achieve a destiny beyond their wildest dreams.”
kiss my ass, AI. again. you know i like it.
and i like the way we are heading / for a star-trekky future / against all odds / and our lizardly mindsets
what will be will be it is what it is buzz click
AI / AI / O
One with Clay, Image and Text 