As always, the alarm went off at 4:45 AM, Mountain Standard Time. On my days off from work it is on so I can gloat that I don’t have to get up yet; and I also get richer dreams in the sleep-in phase. Today I slugabedded till 7:15, a full two and a half hours extra.

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Over oatmeal and coffee I did a Words With Friends “Solo Challenge,” my opponent not a human being but the software-engineered algorithm. These Challenges are like chess problems. For an “easy” opponent you will usually get juicy setups and be able to superscore your way to victory. But for a “hard” opponent you must have more words, and variants of typical words, at your command. In this case my opponent started with “Blawn.” I’d never heard that word–sounds to my perverted mind like the past participle of a verb describing a kinky exhibitionistic sexual practice done in a suburban neighborhood. (Sleep-saturation sends my dream-soaked mind down odd avenues.) But more to the point of winning this Challenge, how do I get a Triple Word Score on this crucial first move? If only “fecal” were six letters long–hey, it IS! all you have to do is parse out the æ from antiquity. The Brits still spell it that way…

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And so it went with me matching weird words with other weird words (who knew “jotty” was a thing??) and on to a satisying victory, with no bad aftertaste that occurs when I outscore a real-life Friend. (I never let anyone win. Ego? Egalitarianism? Entropic effectualness? Eitheror Eeyore way, it is often painful to stick to that policy.)

My next act of leisure was to noodle around with my latest work in progress, “P is for Petunia.” I filled in some background and snazzed up the “calligraphy” some. Later I’ll do a dilettante’s research on petunias for fun facts. They will go to the left of the drawing. But without them, the page is unbalanced. –Hey, Kids, let’s put on a Mashup Show! I took the ceramic “Chess Piece Series” Rook that my mother had kept on a living-room table for ten years or so, and positioned it so it would occlude the empty area. Bonus: the P of Petunia, which had seemed overly, cartoonishly off-kilter, now appears to be gravitationally drawn to the Rook, which gives him…Bad Pun drumroll, please…more Gravitas!! (Sorry not sorry for the Bad Pun.) Then I played with photoediting Andy Warhol style.

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And at 2:14 PM, Mountain Standard Time, my pals Phil, Jeff and Marty and I have a tee time at Palo Verde Municipal 9 Hole Golf Course, where Jeff will win, Marty and Phil will fight for second, and I won’t Suck, because I’m even below Suckitude, golf-wise. But it’s good to be out in the open air with my buds.

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I also spent a little time admiring the classic-artworks screen my mom so cleverly put together over 50 years ago. RIP Mom, and miss you, but glad your hurts are no more. Thank you for encouraging your artist son.

To make a long story slightly longer, this has been, and will continue to be, a gloriously lazy day. I am a luxuriating, lucky man to have these days every single week.

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feat o clay

storebought clay comes in 25lb bags
two bags fit within a 50lb box
forty boxes make a one-ton pallet
and it is cheaper by the ton
but let’s start with what one bag can do

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a quarter of a bag yields an exotic heretofore nonexistent bird
a tenth of a bag might give you a cereal bowl or a small teapot
devoting all 25lb of the bag to one shape might be the life-sized head and shoulders
of a couple of human beings
the same 25lb might depict a village in ultraminiature

2021 0316 vase

“feet of clay” is idiomatic for fallible
but perform a feat o clay
and you become upliftable

2021 0316 closed form

commune
attune
become
one
with
clay

2021 0311 begonia

Today I learned that, as sent red roses signify Passion, and yellow roses Friendship, sent begonias are a way of saying “Be cautious,” and that plus empathy means “Stay Safe,” which is a mild way of saying “I love you and I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.” For this special, dire time, it makes sense to send begonias to loved ones.

Have some Begonias, Friends. ❤

2021 0310 bobbi wells

My latest Bad Pun Brain Teaser Contest was won by Bobbi Wells, a fellow member of the Facebook poet’s group Poets All Call. I had the unique pleasure of meeting Bobbi in person WAY back in the day, when she happened to be in Sedona at the same time that I and my then-sweetheart Denise were also there, and we rendezvoused at the Wildflower Bread Company. She was and is full of bubbly cheer and life, and a bit of magicky mischief. Remembering that visit, I crafted her promised acrostic-portrait prize with a reference to her Eons username anyafairlight, which is so Her that I often still call her Anya.

Bobbi Wells

Bucketize some morning dew
Overpay what’s overdue
Burst the seams of Laughter’s shawl
Bingoize that coverall
In a place where Why-Not dwells
It’s our Anya casting spells

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A long time ago I read “At the Core,” a story by science-fiction author Larry Niven. (Fate-of-the-galaxy spoiler alert.) His protagonist Beowulf Schaeffer was hired by an alien race to pilot a superfast spacecraft to the galactic core. As Schaeffer gets closer he sees a lot of radiation. And as he gets closer yet he discovers that the galaxy is exploding, and in about 25,000 years the deadly radiation chain reaction will reach what is called “known space,” where humans and all aliens that humans have encountered dwell. Soon after Schaeffer reports this to his alien employers, the entire alien race prepares to leave the Galaxy. Schaeffer at first shrugs–who cares about 25,000 years from now?–but then wonders if the aliens, who are considered cowardly, might not be more courageous than we are. At minimum they recognize without denial the danger that they must face, and the sooner the better. Niven ends the story by having Schaeffer think, “Maybe it is the humans who are the cowards–at the core.”

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The ceramic piece with the triangle cutouts was made by me in 2007. The chapbook was made by me, with help from my friends Steve Boyle and Genny Edge, in 2008. I gave both of these creations to my mother soon after they were made, but and they were hers till she died on December 11, 2020, and now they are mine again.

I don’t even remember making the vessel, though I do remember that i did a whole series of cutout pieces back in the day. One of them graced my deceased friend Karen Wilkinson’s front-room table for several years. As for the chapbook, it was a labor of love and I remembered it well, and am grateful that this copy yet exists.

Both works now make me feel strange, and strangely hopeful.

I’ve been doing Title Tuesday, first on eons.com, then on Facebook, for more than ten years. I did one again this morning, but for the first time I asked the poets to try my specialty, which is ACROSTIC Poetry, a genre favored by Lewis Carroll, the author of some of the Psalms of the Old Testament, and many others. So this week’s feature included a primer of sorts. Here it is in its entirety.

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Title Tuesday for March 2, 2021: Acrosticon

Friends, today I want to welcome you to my world, that of acrostic poetry. So we’ll have FIFTEEN titles today, for Beginning, Intermediate, and Advanced acrosticists.

Beginning: Single Acrostic

The first letter of every line will also make words. Might be fun to warm up with an acostic that is also your name.

Gary

Gosh gee whiz
And this here is
Rejoicing to be
Yes, so much to see

Titles:

Mama
Loving
Anteater
Gadzooks
Filibuster

Intermediate: Double Acrostic

This time not only the first letters, but also the last letters, form words.

Kind Lady

Keep a thought that all be well
In a moment sound the bell–a
Nest of goodness C.O.D.
Delivers her love blissfully

Notice that the end of Line Two is really the beginning of Line 3. Sometimes I “fudge” like this when the end letters are hard to rhyme.

Titles:

Good Deed
Early Start
Iron Mine
Hurry Worry
Studebaker Deliveries

That last one will, I hope, be an irresistible challenge for our Stude Stud, Bob Kabchef​​.

Advanced: Triple Acrostic

In this one there will also be a middle column of letters.

Aye Luv Yew

Auld Lang Nay
Yet Unto Joe
Each Veil’s Glow

Joe is, of course, our own Joseph Arechavala​​.

Notice the more columns you put into your acrostic, the trickier it gets, and the “fudgier” you may have to be. But that’s not a bug; it’s a feature. When creativity is demanded of you, the more stubborn you are, the more creative you get.

Titles:

Take Bake Make
Mama Papa Baby
Try Vie Cry
Truth Truly Dares
Guitar Fender Bender

Seem impossible? Not so. If three poets are fearless enough to try even one of these, I will do all of them by midnight.

Have fun, Friends.

“You know you have to go through hell before you/Get to Heaven.” Steve Miller, “Big Old Jet Airliner”

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I had two artichokes that weren’t getting any younger. Right now I don’t have a pot big enough to cook them, but an experiment begged to be tried. Let’s strip a bunch of outer leaves off both and throw the stripped leaves in the pot too. Also, since the ‘chokes still have portions above mean high water, let’s turn them constantly.

It wasn’t the best brace of artichokes I ever had, not by a long shot. Even flawless cooking could not improve the meat-to-leaf ratio, and the stripped leaves had hardly any meat at all. And the thistly, bristly fiber atop the hearts didn’t want to yield to the spoon pull/scrape technique–five more minutes of low boil might’ve helped.

But nothing beats an Artichoke Heart. Whether your dipping sauce of choice is Garlic Butter, Red Wine Vinegar and Olive Oil, or (the way I was raised to enjoy it) Mayonnaise, there is always a little bit of heaven at the Artichoke Heart of Darkness.

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One humble member of my mother’s collection of her son’s ceramic works is a joining of two clay techniques, Pinch-Pottery and Wheel-Throwing. A Pinch Pot is often the first vessel a fledgling potter will make. Take a racquetball-sized ball of clay, stick your thumb in it, and gradually expand the interior by pinching, pinching, pinching the clay between your thumb and your other fingers. Don’t let the hole you first made with your thumb get too big. As the wall gets thinner, use fewer fingers, and for final refinement thumb and index finger only. Wet and smooth the lip. Don’t fret if the lip is a little uneven. It is more charming and organic that way.

Now you have a a bowl for a goblet. For the base, take another little ball of clay and center it on the wheelhead of a potter’s wheel, just like you’ve done dozens (hundreds per year) (thousands by now) of times. Raise a little cylinder with no floor. Spread it out a bit at the.base, collar it in up the stem and flare the lip. Smooth the lip with a bit of wet paper towel, or a chamois if you have one, while the wheel is still spinning.

Bisque fire the pieces separately. Don’t glaze the stem. Dip-glaze the bowl with clear glaze and carefully set it on the stem, and only handle the goblet by the stem until it is loaded into the glaze kiln. The glaze on the bowl will fuse bowl and stem together.

This goblet was made early on in my potter’s journey, perhaps as early as 1989. A goblet I would make now, using the same amount of clay, would be maybe 25% larger, and would not be so topheavy. But my new goblet, though more practical, would be less whimsical. The old goblet is sacred to a time, and my mother liked it enough that she put it on her bookcase across from her recliner, where she wouldseeit every day.