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My path to acrostic poetry began when I was twelve years old, and a Dell Crossword Puzzles book cost thirty-five cents. The book wasn’t all crossword puzzles. My favorite feature was Solicross, where they gave you a nine-by-nine grid and put a circle in one of the squares, blacked out three others, put point values on the rest, gave you a letter list, and let you go to town. It is quite similar to Scrabble, but a Scrabble grid is 15 by 15.

So here’s to Solicross (property of Dell), and to Scrabble (property of Hasbro). Long may they wave!

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Yesterday I attempted portraiture of Anne Hathaway and was not too successful, in my own estimation. As a portraitist I have my good days and not so muches. But “try, try again” I shall, just as I did with James Baldwin on two way back when occasions:

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For over a week, ever since I saw Les Misérables, Anne Hathaway has been singing “I Dreamed a Dream” OVER and OVER in my head. Yesterday I got desperate and decided on exorcism via journal-page. It didn’t work. The page is done, but she’s STILL singing in my head. Somehow this proves that she will win an Oscar for her stirring performance as Fantine.Image

 

Last night in bed my acrostic subconscious tossed me the fact that Fini can mean “The End” and “Shed” can mean “Get rid of” and together they spell FINISHED. I then went to restless sleep. Up at 6am, I drew FINI on one side of the page and SHED on the other. Then I looked at the YouTube of the first hydrogen bomb testing, which was sixty years and two months ago, and scanned the YouTube comments, wishing I could read Arabic. Clicked the “Show more” and read “The new truly scary one is the thermobaric weapon. Could flatten a 400 mile radius.”

Some old Jackson Browne lyrics came to mind, from his “The Road and the Sky”:

Now can you see those dark clouds gathering up ahead?
They’re going to wash this planet clean like the Bible said
Now you can hold on steady and try to be ready
But everybody’s gonna get wet
Don’t think it won’t happen just because it hasn’t happened yet.

Then I FiniShed my page.Image

 

I have spent much of the first three hours of this New Year creating a new page. I wanted to celebrate the new year by doing a renewal-themed page. The ultimate celebration of renewal to my mind is a brass-tacks look at what actually happens to perpetuate Life. I had to leave out stuff like the exploding supernovae that make heavier elements occur in the first place, the absolutely essential floatiness of solid water, a.k.a. ice, and many other factors known and unknown. I stuck to the Nitrogen Cycle, and an obscenely simplified rendering at that, but I invite readers to do a web search on “nitrogen cycle” and find out what Life is REALLY all about, and why we would never exist without Lightning. Happy New Year, friends!

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PS: “Theta-funk” is a horrible corruption of “Theta functions,” essential to the mathematics of string theory. Once William Buckley was asked why he used the word “irenic” instead of “peaceful.” He replied, “Madame, I desired the extra syllable.” Well, messieurs et mesdames, I desired Theta-funk. 🙂

Dorothy Parker thought “Excuse My Dust” would be a fine epitaph. Had her spirit persisted after her death, and hung around Earth to see what happened to her Earthly remains, I think she would have howled to see that her Earthly remains somehow ended up in a filing cabinet for seventeen years.

She had an incomparable wit. I am sorry to have never met her. I pay my respects by paging her with a sonnet.

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Way back in ’09, and early ’09 at that, I took a tangential look at nudity. The effort, with three epigrammatical quotations and two acrostics, looked like this:

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This week I dug it out and had a go at revamping it. I had learned a year ago, reading Art Spiegelman’s awe-inspiring MegaMaus, that his Pulitzer-Prize-winning Maus was thirteen years in the making, and that he’d painstakingly done draft after draft of comic-book pages, panel studies, and layouts. Now I would see what reflection and rework would do for one of my own.

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This study includes the epigrams but not the acrostics. I added a quotation, concentrated more on the calligraphy, experimented with more angled text presentations, and drew a different imagined nude cat lady. (I felt the original looked too YOUNG-old.) Then I did a text study of my acrostics:

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Note the lines “Magistrate or Auntie Em/A Joy, a Challenge, a Dilemma.” The scansion sort of jumps the rails to maintain acrostic integrity; were there no acrostic, the break would yield “Magistrate or Auntie Em a/Joy, a Challenge, a Dilemma.” I especially liked the flat-breaking plane of the NAKED NAKED NAKED triple acrostic. Now I was ready to integrate the studies into yet another study.

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This result took about three hours, and could have taken another three to unmuddy and finesse the image, had I the time. I do not, so I will save the FINAL final image for another time. But there’s a valuable creative-process lesson in reworking an original. I will be doing a lot more reworking, of this and many others, in 2013 and beyond.

Here is the evolution of a journal page, spoon-fed:

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But sometimes we go too far. In this case, the finished spoon, unadorned, seems to speak for itself.

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The title of this post is “Spoon Render Anthology.” It refers obliquely to the classic SPOON RIVER ANTHOLOGY by Edgar Lee Masters, which is a poem cycle of capsule biographies told by the permanent residents of a graveyard. It is, pardon the pun, haunting, to say the least, and brilliant; and if only one reader of these message-in-a-bottle words goes into the ethers and finds and reads it, this blog post will have succeeded beyond its dream of avarice…

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It’s Christmas morning, 5:08 AM local time as I type. The houseguests and the significant other sleep soundly, I hope. Soon the year will end.

In 2010 I encouraged readers of my journal pages to “Try NEW Out.” In 2013 I will be taking my own advice.

Happy Holiday, whatever your holiday may be!