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[Originally published in the Facebook group Poets All Call, earlier today.]

five such things

there are five such things as desire
want
ambition
lust
appetite
dissatisfaction

and there are five such things as death
cessation
mortality
zero
discontinuity
oblivion

but there is only one such thing
as you where you are
receiving this message from me
wherever i may be
telling you that you are loved
and that you deserve
good tears and lusty laughter
and the overhauling
of pain
with riotous joy

there are eleven thousand
nine hundred and thirty-two
such
things
as

 

shadow on the moon

i throw a shadow on the moon
the sun recoils
the planets
S W O O N

2016-07-16 00.03.54

Yesterday there was a Celebration of Life for my friend and classmate Charlie Rhodes. In the chapel, having arrived early, I wrote this before the Celebration began:

******
charlie rhodes, modest colossus

in the framed picture of charlie to the left
of his casket he is wearing number 55 on his
chest and shoulders a bengals cap on his head
and a moustache and his grin on his beaming face
there are three flower arrangements to the right of
his flag-draped casket and a slide show above it
charlie was so full of zest I would not be
too astonished if he burst out of his casket right now
“i really had you going didn’t i guys”
and he would give us his blessed cheerfulness
that charlie
joked at our 20th reunion that he had become an adult film star under the name ‘chuck stake’
the last i saw him was here at the service of his dad
so long, charlie
you were the king of cheer
so long, chuck
save a fluffer for me
*****
After the funeral I worked my shift at the airport and came home and wrote this to the music of Jackson Browne’s “Fountain of Sorrow”:
*****
layers 2016
there are two tabs on my browser now
jackson browne sings “fountain of sorrow” on the other tab
youtube as usual
and i write right now on this tab

but deeper into the background is the bus ride home
and the driver and his colleague talking about a friend
who was forced to take a cab
it bothered them: it was like the shoemaker’s children barefoot

and the next layer down is the shift i worked
and a mistake i made that almost resulted in a reprimand
i had interrupted a server taking an order
and the diner rightfully took offense

and earlier than my shift was a sandwich:
busride/funeral/busride
a friend’s remains boxed and outside the box
grievers “celebrated” as best they could

jackson browne has finished singing
my feet feel better unshod
my shift ended well
my dead friend sleeps without bad dreams

*****

As midnight approached I finished the poem and the drawing above, and here we are.

I have only a handful of posts to do before my 1000th post. I want them to be among the best posts I’ve ever done, and I want the 1000th post to be the best of all. I want it to help justify my existence . . .

. . . and I may try too hard and clench up. So this is the cautionary “SLOW DOWN!” that Darlene Goto, extraordinary Art Teacher of two-thirds of my life ago, wrote by way of critique of my first submitted portfolio, in her Drawing & Composition class at Glendale Community College in the Fall semester of 1973. With the handful of pre-1000th posts to do, and seven weeks or so to work with, I will unclench and unrush and have fun and be loose.

Back in a week or so . . .

 

prince joins amy winehouse in the state we call death. it is comforting to imagine that in their shared state they are making collaborative music together.

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both pushed the innovation envelope. both had to ignore some realities, and both paid the final price for that.

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we who are left are left with their music. if it inspires us–and it has, especially among supremely talented musicians–they do not utterly die.

too restless to rest in peace

too alive for it to press as an issue

i and my mortality observe what must soon come

 

these words are one thing thought another learned

 

the harshness of audio

in telemetry

in the swiftly-pulled zipper of a body bag

drive us to many distractions

 

“alas” is wordsister to “love”

 

and death unnoticed by those he has claimed

Here’s an example of pen & ink, with the acrostic embellished with color permanent-ink Faber-Castell pens. Done back in Aught-Eight, when I was writing single-acrostic sonnets like crazy. The umbilicus, nasturtium, opossum and encyclical illustrate the first four lines.

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Understandable

Umbilicuses pave the stem cell highway
Nasturtiums have ornamental blossums
Deliciousness sometimes requires opossums
Encyclicals so seldom see things my way.
Rich as a soil may be, if dry, it’s barren.
Soft kisses thrill–OR make the Ticklish jump.
The misbehaving hair may snarl & clump
Albeit seeming fair as Rose of Sharon.
Near Death, Experience is tartly flavored
Deliverance to Death’s Door bad-outrageous
Afflicted oldsters call for Priest or Magus:
Beneficence to help a soul be Favored–
Lo and Be Told: I’ll be a deathbed Coward–
Expect some yelping with this–UNempowered.

A week ago my dear and wonderful friend of more than twenty-four years, Karen Wilkinson, was alive and well. Friday she was stricken and felled by a brain aneurysm. Monday they removed life support and, I infer, harvested what organs of hers they could use.

While she was still not technically dead, I tried feebly to do creative things. Here’s what I did on Sunday the 4th:

001 002

The would-be poem seems finished but is not. After Karen died, I tried again, and wrote what I intend to read at the Caffeine Corridor poetry event tomorrow night:

fiddle away over and out

there was this girl in a jeans skirt in the spring of 1990
librarian glasses and face and demeanor like talia shire in rocky
but with a violin that spoke for her
boldly stepping into the sound of the livingroom band she’d just joined
and the girl and her fiddle turned three needy guitars into contrapuntal gold
at times trumping them with platinum

years later “roller derby queen” by jim croce reached new heights
when during the instrumental the sound crescendoed
and the fiddle did a trick of stringzipping into the stratosphere
followed by a beat of complete and magic silence
followed by the resumption of the raucous rollicking sound

the girl and her fiddle went with her piano-playing pal to jazz camp
and they grinned and grinned on their return

elsewhere in 2007
much of the band went to a cabin near grand lake colorado
played and played and sang and danced and snored and hiked and played and played
the promised moose never showed but the music flowed and made all all right
and the fiddler bent and swayed with that music and folded her excellence into it

her face focused transcendence
her rosined bow a dervish

sometimes she’d take the fiddle away from her chin and sing
because she wanted to hold voice-hands with the rest of us

and through a miracle of wishful thinking and overdub
i hear her voice and fiddle now together

001

The Urban Dictionary’s #1 definition of Geek is “The people you pick on in high school and wind up working for as an adult.” The kids I drew on this page are still being picked on, but they know they rock.

Here are the words to the triple acrostic:

Good LORD–feel that enthusiasm–each a superstar
Enjoy our radiation: safe enough for Gramp & Gamma
EnDANGERment is mocked–we use a Death’s-head-grin alarm
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar holds court within our diorama

Note also the hidden message via blacked-up letters: “THUS–ugh–Death holds our wit.”

Speaking of the awesome, starring-in-AIRPLANE! Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, who just wrote a guest column about racism in a major publication, long ago I made up this riddle about him:

Q: What should you sing if Kareem Abdul-Jabbar has his thumb in your coffee cup as he’s handing it to you?

A: “You’re the Kareem in my Coffee…”

Yes, I’m a Joke Geek. And vice versa.

Image

This page has been hanging fire since a year ago March, and since I’ve got the breakthrough-I-hope HEIRLOOM TOMATOES and SUSAN GROCE, PRINTMAKER acrostics waiting in the wings, I thought it’d be a good warmup and character-builder to finish it. Chandler wrote detective fiction that was about more than slinky dames and flying bullets. John D. MacDonald and Michael Connelly, I am sure, would cheerfully acknowledge a debt to him.

Here are the words to the double acrostic:

Cull California for its Vine, its Creeper
Have Scheming Dames all lure for Loot: what Drama
And Big Sleep may not be for Big nor Sleepy
Nor Loveliness fare well when Tomcats tom
Detection with its Dicta and its Tao
Lets Danger threaten Life & Limb & Hymen
Entice, intrigue, inveigle–draw a Shroud
Rig Marlowe with a case as hard as Diamond