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Were YOU There with Vic and Gair?

May 16, 2014
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Photo by Deborah Berman, co-host of Balboa House Poetry

Here are the two co-features of Balboa House Poetry’s April 2014 event, collaboratively reading. Victoria Hoyt and I have been friends for a good half-dozen years, and it is always an honor to perform with her.

Vic went on first, and she moved the audience to laughter and tears and glowing good feeling. Then I went on, showing off an acrostic portrait of Patrick Stewart, a valentine to my Sweetheart, Denise, and certain other selected poems. Fellow poet Paul Dlouhy had offered harmonica accompaniment, and I took him up on it for my “The Love Song of Heinrich Chinaski, Deceased.” We had never rehearsed, and I suggested before we started that Paul come in with a cadence like walking. He did a jazz/street riffarama that was perfect for my words.

Finally, Vic joined me at the podium and we did some back&forth haiku we’d written in e-mail exchange a few years ago:

Dueling Haiku

Gair:

Spring

Blossoms all around
Transport me and my nose to
Pollenesia

Vic:

No Spring

Millions of meno-
Pausal baby boomers add
To global warming

Gair:

Global Warming

Global warming’s cool
Majestic ice calves make
Ocean on the rocks

Vic:

No Global Warming

From Lark to Exxon
Smoke and mirror scientists
Falsify research

Gair:

Falsification Haiku

Weapons of bereaved
Weepings of mass destruction
“Whoops–honest mistake!”

Vic:

No Falsification Haiku

Now playing on your
Smart phone: Iraq war heli-
Copter video

Gair:

VideoHaiku

Blockbuster’s busted
Netflix flickers red box loi-
Ters near entrances

Vic:

No VideoHaiku

Reality killed
The video star who killed
The radio star

Lastly, we read this, which we’d written together on a sketchpad. First Vic wrote one word, then I two, then she four, then I eight, and so forth till we got to 32, and then we imploded it back to the final word, which we co-wrote: “BLOOD.” No transcript is available at present, but wrestling through it is half the fun…

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Long story concluded: a good time was had be all, and especially us!

the funniest man on earth

December 8, 2013
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Four years ago I kicked off my “Lives of the Eminent Poets of Greater Phoenix” with two of my favorite Valley Poets. One was Victoria Hoyt, with whom I’m co-featuring at the April 2014 edition of Balboa House Poetry. The other is the man I depicted above, Mr. Bill Campana, who, since George Carlin has passed, I am reasonably certain is the Funniest Man on Earth. Today is Bill’s birthday, and I wish him all the best.

Words:

Bluff, and stand-up-comical, and full of manic manna
It’s a wonder he’s still local–catch him if you can
Laudably SELF-AMPLIFIED: you will hear from this man
Las Vegas @ the Palace or perhaps the Tropicana

Bill commissioned a coffee mug from me, and says of my posted birthday wish for him, “thanks, gary. it’s muggier when i drink out of your coffee mug.” He uses lower case in his online communications, so as further tribute to him the title of this post is in lower case.

Last time I saw Bill was at the home of Julie Elefante and Robert Lee, and I took this picture of him:

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Again–Happy Birthday, Bill!

Ballyhooed and/or Bali High

March 7, 2013
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Here are the words to the two acrostics:

Balladeers say woh woh woh
Æsop tells Behold & Lo
Learn if the response is no
Long promotions will abrade
Yell-less wisdom gives us aid

Beautiful Pacific isles–they’re anything but meh
Analoguing MYSTERY & dreams–think nature/khaki
Losing touch with things that count may lead us to inveigh
Interest in TRAVEL may enlaurel & enwreath

At the top left of this page is a halo hovering over the head of my friend of more than five years, Phoenix poet Victoria Hoyt. Below her head, and the origin of the arrow pointing to her, is my birthday message for her, which includes an apt quotation from Brian Hooker’s translation of Edmond Rostand’s famous play Cyrano de Bergerac, Act I, scene i. “The best friend and the bravest soul alive!” suits Victoria. She is true-blue loyal, a tough-love mother, sister, and friend, and the most honest and charming performance poet north of the South Pole.

A little over three years ago, I did a page exclusively about Victoria which ended up in my chapbook LIVES of the Eminent Poets of Greater Phoenix, Arizona, for which Victoria wrote the introduction. Her page came out like this:

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Lastly, there’s a note mentioning Raymond Chandler on the page. I got curious about what he looks like so I Wiki’d him. I found his face so intriguing that I did a sketch on the spot. Finally, I figured the double acrostic CHANDLER RAYMOND would work well if I made the final D double-long to facilitate a final couplet and make up for the one-character deficit in Raymond. Here’s yet another opportunity to collaborate with me: Write That Acrostic!

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